Regular readers of Edspire will know that I cannot drive. Therefore I am out and about on trains and foot with Esther and William every day bumping into lots of members of Joe Public. The one retort that I hear most of all is, “Cor, you’ve got your hands full” or “Bet they are a handful!” To this remark I usually give a little smile or a bit of a giggle but I never quite know what to say, especially when I know that I am expecting another little squidger in May. What on earth are people going to say to me then? I know I should not care what other people think of me but sadly I really do. I don’t want people to think badly of me and I certainly don’t want them to think badly of my children.
I know that having three little ones under two is going to be hard work but I am ready for the challenge, I am just not sure that I am ready to hear what all the world has to say.
At 14 weeks I am only just telling most people about the pregnancy and I find myself feeling quite funny as I tell people who I do not know, especialy if Esther and William are with me, which they nearly always are.
I worry that people who do not know us will judge us. Esther and William are so small and look so young. Already some people have felt the need to ask the age of Esther and William when I have told them our news.
It is silly really. I should be excited and proud to be carrying another squidger. It is a dream come true for our little family and anyone who knows us, and our circumstances, understands.
And really I should not worry about the others, yet I do.
I think that perhaps it is because sometimes I am anxious that given Esther and William’s prematurity the age gap is just too small. How am I going to cope with three babies under two? How are we going to get around?
I know that things are going to be hard but there are steps I can take to make things work for us as a family and tricks that I am sure I will learn along the way.
Coping with the initial lack of sleep I think is going to be hard. And how on earth am I to find a routine that works for us all? How will I get out and about with three little squidgers to get out of the door? How will I share my time and my love fairly between the three?
I know that there are challenges ahead. i know that there are going to be times when I will just need to scream. But I am so excited about it all, so why am I not saying to those who feel the need to tell me that my hands are already full that actually they will be fuller soon as I’ve another squidger on the way?
I am going to be a proud Mummy of three!
Are you a proud Mummy with a small age gap? What would be your top tips for making it work? I genuinely would love to know x