Set Adrift Set Alight

Thursday is Tilda’s birthday

Our baby daughter would be one

If she were still alive

Sadly she is not

And we have chosen this day

Her special day

To send her ashes to sea

To finally set her free.

David has built a beautiful boat.

The ideal scenario is that we set it alight

Ashes inside

And it drifts gently out to sea.

We know that it is not likely to be as easy

Or as poetic as this.

We have to have alternatives.

We have to be prepared

With a way of saying goodbye that we are truly happy with

If the original idea does not go to plan.

The dream is that Tilda lays in the boat her Daddy has built

We cover her with Balsa wood stars

Set the boat and our baby alight

And let them drift out to sea

We want Tilda to be in the sea

So that we can be with her wherever we are

She will shine bright as a star in the sky

She will shimmer on every ripple of water as our star of the sea

She will be every where we are

Always

If the conditions are against us

This Thursday afternoon

We will scatter her ashes directly into the sea

We will send with them

The balsa wood stars

Pink and purple flowers

And all our hopes and dreams that will now never ever be

I want Matilda to know what I wished for her

The life I had planned for her

For her and me

Thursday will be a day to send her bubble kisses to the sky

To tell her with each breath how much she is loved

And show her with each tear how much she is missed

Thursday

We will

Set adrift

Set alight

Our baby girl

And we will set her spirit free

Until we meet again Matilda Mae

I love you x

22 thoughts on “Set Adrift Set Alight

  1. So beautifully written, I have thought of you today hoping the sun has helped you find the special place for Matilda. Sending you lots of strength and thoughts for all of you x x x x x

  2. I’m thinking of you all. I hope this week, and Thursday in particular, is what it needs to be. Sending you love and peace xxx

  3. I really hope the sun shines for you on Thursday and it all goes to plan, but oh how I wish it didn’t have to be this way. I wish I could turn back time for you Jennie. Love and hugs to you xxxx

  4. That’s a beautiful boat, well done David. I hope that you get to release Tilda into the sea as you’d like to, if the sea is calm it will be perfect. I do think your contingency plan is going to be beautiful as well. I’ll be thinking of you.

  5. That picture never ever fails to bring a tear to my eye. I love it. I love love love the way you are both looking at each other, especially Tilda. She knows! She knows just how much you love her, always have and always will. What you are planning to do on Thursday is going to take so much strength and it sounds so perfect. I never totally understood the sea thing, I don’t think. Not until I just read it here- she will be everywhere, as the ocean surrounds us. It makes sense to me now. I am thinking of you so so much and hoping with everything I can that it all goes right on Thursday xxxxx

  6. Jennie before you send her off have you considered the memorial jewlery that you
    Can have made from some of her ashes? It might be something to consider as you can wear her close and maybe something Esther would like in the future? There are lots of different things from diamonds to less expensive rings and pendants. X

  7. I really hope it goes to plan for you, and for Tilda. This is not how it should be, she should be here with you, but she will be with you always. I admire how lovely you can write about something so raw and emotional. Sending so much strength for this week especially Thursday xx

  8. It seems like the right thing – the sea. Though I can never imagine how it must feel. But being surrounded by the sea seems some small comfort. Will be thinking of you on Thursday and hope the conditions can be just right xx

  9. Your plans are so beautiful and I really hope that the conditions are perfect. I would prepare Esther and William for Mummy and Daddy being very upset though – it is ok for them to see that, but maybe good to gently explain. There is no doubt little Matilda Mae knows how very much she is loved. Will be thinking of you and praying on Thursday and so wish it were different and she was here with you xxx

  10. Beautiful and tragic. I agree with ghostwritermummy, I didn’t understand the sea thing and you made it make sense. We will blow bubble kisses for Tilda on Thursday and do pink and purple star printing. Thinking of you. Remember old treasured memories and try to make some new happy ones too. Xx

  11. Thinking of you all as you work your way towards this special, special day. What a perfect way to set her free and the boat is just beautiful. What a clever daddy! We will say a special prayer for Tilda on Thursday to speed her on her way xx

  12. It all sounds so beautiful Jennie, I really hope you get the right conditions and that everything goes as you have planned. Tilda knows the life you had planned for her, I’m sure of that. Lots of love – think of you, always xx

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