School Daze: Making The Best Choice For Premature Twins

Earlier this year I fought

I fought hard

On behalf of my premature twins

To get their school start delayed

Born in July 2010

Due at the end of October

They should not start school until September 2015

But in the current system were being asked to start in September 2014

At just 3 Mummy said No

No way!

Esther and William are now nearly 4

I am still certain that they are not ready for school full time

But am now wondering about starting them part time

It is not easy to decide

And I am sure I will change my mind again

Perhaps many times

But I owe it to my children

To explore all the options

Based on how they are now

Not where they were 8 months ago

Now my beautiful twins

Are showing themselves to be incredibly bright

Curious and imaginative

They know numbers

They know letters

They can read and spell CVC words

They love stories

They love learning new things

William has an amazing memory

They both have a capacity for learning facts

For understanding processes

Now my beautiful twins

Are still very very small for their age

William is still in nappies

He cannot dress or undress himself

Esther can but still needs lots of help

I think they would struggle with full days at school

But I wonder if they would enjoy 15 hours a week

Getting to know the school and the children

Getting to know the rules and routines

Getting to know the system

That they will spend the next 7 years of their life with

We have already decided that we would move them to a new preschool

Perhaps a Montessori

For the year

But now I am thinking if that is best?

If we are going to move them

Why not move them to school?

Let them have a year of mornings

Before going full time in 2015

When they are 5

I wonder if this would be best?

It means that they will only be moved once

Not twice

We only need to explain our family story

Esther and William’s history

To one school

The school is literally over the road from our house

The school are willing to offer 15 hours a week

And then decide in September 2015

Whether Esther and William stay in reception full time

Or move straight up to Year 1

It is a mixed age class

So whichever decision we choose

They would remain with the same class

The same teacher and staff

I think that they would enjoy the mornings

I would bring them home for lunch

And then we could spend our afternoons

Much as we do now

Outside

Doing messy play

Just playing and being

And learning about life outside of school

Because that is important too

Especially when you are only just 4

We still have time to decide

What is the best thing to do

A slow transition to school

A year of Montessori

Staying at preschool

We still have time to decide

What to do for the best

siblings3

10 thoughts on “School Daze: Making The Best Choice For Premature Twins

  1. What a lovely post! I actually relate to it a lot, even though my son is only 2 and a September birthday, we are debating whether to send him to pre school at all next January when he is just over 3.
    They spend so little time being little, and so many years in school. I want to treasure this time with him.
    I think a year of mornings to a school so close to you is a lovely idea 🙂
    Good luck with your decision, whatever it is xx

  2. I think if it is a slow, steady, relaxed start and that they are not in a class of 30 children, which it sounds as though they will not be, then why not start them on mornings?

  3. I think it’s lovely you are fighting for what is best with your children. I didn’t expect my twins to settle so quickly and so well into yrR. They surprised me! They had only done their 15hrs a week at preschool prior to starting school. I chose the option to let them settle in with the slowest option of weeks but half way through I soon realised they were more than ready and were more bothered that they were missing out on lunchtime and more playtime with their new friends. So I changed it and let them start full time. They loved it and it is beautiful seeing them learn new things and making lovely friendships. So maybe it is worth them starting school as a yrR and see how they go. The teachers and them will tell you how they are doing and follow their lead. The school sound lovely and perfect for you.

  4. Well done on fighting your corner. I personally would keep them at pre-school for the extra year. If they attend just mornings they will miss out on friendship groups being formed not being there in the afternoon, this could have an effect on their social development. Also if they spend the year doing mornings and then you decide they will redo the year they will see their friends move on and not them. My friend had this happen to her child and he has really struggled socially seeing his friends move on and those children have been picking on him calling him a baby. I’m not sure of the school set up you have chosen but this might not happen if mixed classes? I do not agree with starting school so young and love the Scandinavian ethos and they are the only country and excel in exams. I would keep them out as long as possible if I could.
    A big decision, good luck xx

  5. Such a huge decision for you both to make-I have found it a hard decision based on only choosing a school so can only imagine how hard it must be for you both!

    Could you try them for 15 hours a week and then pull out if it was not working for them or does it have to be completely definite. It certainly sounds like they are more than ready mentally, I think you just have to follow your gut instinct, good luck with whatever decision you choose xx

  6. Both my big girls have gone to preschool within a school from 3 and for them it was brilliant. Rosie can’t wait to start school in Sept now when she will be 4 like her Sister was. Each child is individual but it sounds as though they are more than ready x

  7. Montessori is a wonderful choice a half way house between home and school and a great safe place to begin to learn. For different reasons letting my twins go was not an easy decision but it is one I have not regretted for a minute thanks to the Montessori world they have been introduced to. Whatever decision you make it will be the right one, you are an amazing Mum. x

  8. Hi Jennie, as you know Amelia was born on the same day as Esther and William, 7 weeks early, and I so relate to this with you. Actually we decided to put her in a Montessori school literally qtr a mile away, it’s small and select and the teachers are wonderful, she has been there 6 months now and has come on heaps, she adores it, and made so many little friends, she has the afternoons at home doing messy play and clubs with her daddy, their ages range from 2.5 to 4, so if she wants to play with someone young than her age then she does and thrives on it. We have made the huge decision to let her go to school in Spetember, we know the school and think She will be okay, but god it’s been a tough decision, and I’m still worried she will be tired. I wish you so much support with this decision but only you and David know whats best for them. Xx

  9. It sounds like Esther and William are doing incredibly well Jennie. I was in a very similar situation having prem 27 weeker twins in June ’09, so they should theoretically have gone to school this Sept ’14 if they’d come when they were meant to! However, I decided to keep them with their preschool friends and they started last September ’13. Their preschool teachers thought they would cope too. I have to say I am so pleased with how they are doing, despite one of them being in nappies till the March before they started and not much dressing ability either. They matured so much over the summer before their big school adventure, have made friends and are progressing very well with their academic work – no extra interventions now being needed. They aren’t quite the shortest ones in their class either!! I am one very proud mum!
    Go with your gut instinct and good luck with whatever decision you make xx

  10. I think Montessori is a terrific option. I wouldn’t start part-time at school, because they will then be missing out on half of what goes on in the class, and may then have to see all their new friends move up without them and start Reception all over again, at which point they may even become a bit bored with the same routines, same topics etc. There’s so much research into the benefits of starting later and the disadvantages of starting early. However ready they are, they will not ‘go off the boil’ just by waiting a little more. xxxx

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