Febrile Fear: Another Night We Will Never Forget

Yesterday I set up a lovely activity for our Minibeast Monday

Esther and William love threading at the moment

So I laid out a table of different threading challenges

William was keen to get started

Esther was rather reluctant

In fact all she really wanted to do was cuddle

I thought perhaps it was because I had been away for the weekend

She seemed very hot

I changed her out of the tshirt and leggings that she wore to school

Into a sleeveless summery dress

She was still hot and so I gave her some Nurofen

I asked David to check and he agreed she was hot

She never really got to grips with the threading yesterday

But she did eat some snacks, do some puzzles and jigsaws

Have a walk round the garden

And eat her tea

She was flushed and warm

I gave her some Calpol while she was in the bath

After her bath as we were getting ready for bed

She became a bit agitated

She was on David’s lap and kept pulling his arms tighter round her

She was naked from the bath

I kept watching her

I was worried about her

As I watched

I told David that she did not look right

Then all of a sudden

So suddenly

Her eyes rolled into the back of her head

Her head flopped forwards

And then backwards

She looked out cold

I thought she was dead

I screamed to David

And to David’s Dad who was upstairs

I ran to the phone and called 999

I was screaming down the phone

I recognised the tone of my voice

I have used it before

The night Matilda died

And though I was talking about Esther

And getting out the words I needed to say

In my head all I could here was myself screaming

She’s dead! She’s dead!

While I was on the phone

David and his Dad rushed into action

They took Esther outside

She was all floppy

And so pale

Ashen white

Blue around the lips

She was burning up

Daddy and Granddad dunked her in the paddling pool

Hoping that would rouse her

It did not

They wrapped her in a wet towel

The David panicked that something might be stuck in her airway

He put her over his shoulder and hit her on the back

Granddad stood behind

And after seconds that felt like hours

Said that our little girl was breathing

Granddad took over on the phone

I ran to the lounge

To find William

Crying and hyperventilating

Our poor little boy was terrified

I picked him up and he clung to me

And cried

How we both cried

Esther was now in the recover position

Not really responding to us

We kept talking to her

Daddy was trying to get her to answer a question

Trying to make her laugh

She started to respond

She was so pale

Frail

Weak

She started to respond more

But her temperature was also starting to rise again

There was nothing more we could do

But wait for the ambulance to arrive

And be ready to ride with her to the hospital

We had no idea what was wrong with our beautiful girl

The ambulance arrived

We took Esther into the ambulance

To be checked

At this point her temperature was 38.7

They told us that she had suffered a Febrile Convulsion

And while this was terrifying

It was not usually anything to worry about

It was the body’s reaction to her fever

Not helped by the hot, humid weather

I was living a split life

There with Esther

But also there with Tilda

All over again

The fear

The pain

Surely there was no way we were going to lose another child?

And though I could hear the words

She is going to be all right

You have done all the right things

It just would not sink in

Once Esther had been checked

We rode in the ambulance to A&E

All the while remembering the last time we had made this journey

Taking Tilda’s dead body to the same hospital

Esther was still dazed in the ambulance

She looked so small

Tiny and naked wrapped in a white sheet

When she spoke in her Daddy’s arms

It was to ask for William

The next thing was to ask if she was going home

When we arrived at the hospital and waiting in A&E

She turned to me and stroked my face

And without any prompting said

I love you

It was almost too much

I can not bear the thought of ever losing Esther

Or William

We were seen by a doctor in A&E

Who confirmed the diagnosis of Febrile Convulsion

Esther’s blood pressure was very low

Her temperature was still very high

It was after about an hour of being at the hospital

That Esther started to become more normal again

Able to talk to us more

To play on Daddy’s phone

She was so loving

And cuddly

I think she had had quite a shock

We had certainly had quite a fright

Knowing that Tilda died suddenly

When Esther collapsed

It was the natural thing for me to think

That Esther was dead too

The pain etched across David’s face

The tears in his eyes

Told me that he felt the same

I am so so thankful that Esther is alive

That we brought our eldest daughter home

The hospital were wonderful

We were taken up to the children’s ward

Where Esther was examined again

They ruled out a urine infection

And talked to us more about Febrile Convulsions

Before letting us take our daughter home

David’s Dad collected us from the hospital

By this time Esther was seeming to be fine

I was all stiff and swollen and feeling quite ill

At 34 weeks pregnant

Having not eaten since lunch time some 12 hours ago

I was not in a good physical state

I was also not sure amidst all the panic

If I had been feeling Rainbow Baby move

David and I were also both an emotional mess

Once again we had been reminded

How precious and fragile life can be

How much we adore our children

Each other

How grateful we are to have David’s parents so very close by

And as David’s Dad drove us home through the early hours

I remembered that same journey

16 months before

With David’s Mum at the wheel

And no car seat carrying precious cargo in the back of the car

My heart broke for Baby Tilda

Our beautiful Matilda Mae

But I was so thankful that Esther was with us

And we were taking her home

Watching your daughter collapse in her father’s arms

Is a terrifying thing

Made all the worse when you have already had one baby die

You feel helpless

Lost

Distraught

And yet something takes over you

And you do what has to be done

Because you are a mother or a father or a grandfather

You do what you do out of love and desperation

To save a little life

Family Photographer Essex and London

Febrile convulsions are usually ‘benign’

They are apparently common in small children

But they are utterly terrifying when they happen to someone who is part of you

I wish I had known about them

Before our beautiful Esther had one

Before we thought that our eldest daughter had been taken from us suddenly too

Esther is on the road to recovery now

I think that this night will haunt David and I

For a long long time to come

33 thoughts on “Febrile Fear: Another Night We Will Never Forget

  1. On Jennie, how very scary for you all. I’m glad Esther is OK after her experience, but I bet William will need a lot more cuddles while he gets it all sorted in his head. Big hugs. Xxx

  2. Could hardly finish reading this through tears. How utterly terrifying for you all. Thank goodness Esther is home and better. I honestly don’t know how you cope with everything that life is throwing at you. Xx

  3. Crying here. I can imagine how scary that was. It’s different, but when Twinkle was a baby, 6 weeks maybe i think, she had a temperature and stopped responding to us. we called an ambulance and went to hospital, I remember unstoppable tears and shaking because my brain went immediately to shes going to die, im going to lose another baby. we are forever changed by those experiences.

  4. I knew of these and kept my eye on my son when he had a fever, at one point I was really scared as his body was shaking but his was boiling hot. I’m so sorry you had to go through this, it is only now you know that it isn’t uncommon or life threatening but when you see it happening it is so scary and terrifying I can understand how you must have felt.
    I’m glad David’s Dad was with you to help out and I’m glad Esther is feeling better. Hope William is also okay as well as yourself and David.

  5. You poor poor thing, we have been there twice with Baba. First one he was 8 months old and he was so hot and poorly, I got my father in law to take us to the doctor and he had the convulsion in the car. He went completely blue, my FIL had to bring him back round I was screaming in the middle of the street and was hysterical. I knew what it was but was still hysterical. I have had them, Mr had them and our nephew had them we knew Baba had a high chance of having them. His second he had around 15 months and was at my mums without me and started to have one in his highchair. Getting that phone call from my dad I have never run so fast in all my life. It is the most frightening thing in the world. But it is very common, and a normal thing. Now at nearly 6 Baba and his daddy and I are pros at nurofen and calpol, he is super at school telling them if he is hot and too be honest he never fails to know when he has a temperature and goes to get his medicine from the office. He is also near the cut off point for having them although he does also suffer with rigors which are very similar but he doesn’t loose consciousness, they are almost like a warning that his temperature is rising and to be aware. Those he wont grow out of but we are used to them, he can still talk to us with them and is still with us. I am totally with you that it is the most frightening thing ever and after Matilda I can not imagine how scared you are. But she is and will be ok, her little body is actually doing her good, it’s fighting the temp and that is a good thing however horrible it is. All my love as always and I hope you can rest soon after this xxxxxxxx

  6. Even though I knew from FB that Esther was doing ok this evening, reading thisi just could help feel terrified for you. I was shaking. Knowing you had to live through all those emotions and motions again. I’m so glad you had David’s Dad with you. I can only imagine the horror you must have all been reliving.
    I’m so glad that Esther is OK.
    Sending you all my love. Lucy xx

  7. goodness Jennie words fail me but what an absolute shocker and a reminder of how precious life is and how important loved ones are. i am so relieved she is ok and you all are, if very badly shaken up (hugs) x xx

  8. oh Jennie, my son had a Febrile Convulsion on Friday 13. Just like you described. I have never been so scared in all my life, I thought he was choking, we treated him for choking and then he went floppy and blue/grey he couldn’t speak, his eyes pinpricks, rolling, then gone. I thought he was dying in our arms on our front doorstep, I thought he had choked too long. I cannot imagine how scary it was for you having already lost a child, I have never been so scared in all my life. The paramedic brought him round and he was back to himself by the time we got to hospital. After two days of tests, we too had it explained that it was common, a febrile convulsion that he was fine. To be honest I am finding it hard at the moment, I am terrified it will happen again, I am waking up crying or nightmaring he is gone even though logically I know that if it did he would be fine. I just feel very traumatised. Sending you lots of love xxxx

  9. I’m so so sorry that you had to make this scary experience and so glad that Esther was well enough to come back home with you again. I can’t even imagine how scared you must have been…

  10. We have also experienced febrile convulsions. Lexi was 23 months old, I had just started my first day at my apprenticeship, my mil was doing me a favour and had her for the day as I couldnt get her into nursery. I got back about 5.40, she was hot and grumpy and not wanting to play really, at 5.50 she had her fit sat on my knee, I froze completely and didn’t know what to do 🙁 lexi is now a happy 3 and a half year old but fevers panic me so much now. I’m glad Esther is ok though xx

  11. I cannot imagine what you and David must have gone through, the raw painful emotions brought flashing back. I hope William is ok too, he must have been so scared. I am glad to read that Esther is ok.

  12. I am so sorry!! This sounds horrific and I’m crying just thinking about it. Thank you for making us aware. Temperatures are very very scary. I hope Esther is feeling better now and your little family can have some peace.

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  14. My heart aches for you Jennie and the never ending worries you endure. I am so unbelievably thankful that Esther is Ok and just want to hug little William for all that he has seen and heard. I cannot Imagine how you feel but am truly glad that all is Ok – physically speaking of course. Love and prayers xx

  15. What a horrible experience for you all. Febrile convulsions are so, so scary. I blogged about one Arlo had when he was 8 months old – like you, I had absolutely no clue what was going on, and I thought the worst. I still get anxious when he is poorly. Hope Esther is feeling a bit better now x

  16. Oh my goodness Jennie, my heart just broke all over again for you, couldn’t read through the tears. What an awful things for you all to go through, especially after all you have been through with Tilda too. I can only imagine how frightened and horrified you must have been. I am glad she is on the mend, and can only hope that William, David and you recover mentally in time from this as must have been so scary for you all. Take care xxx

  17. Jennie I missed all this. How utterly terrifying for you and David, and Esther and William. I knew of these from my friend who is a health visitor but didn’t realise they could be so incredibly scary. I am so so glad that Esther is ok, and thank you for highlighting the issue for other parents. After all your family have been through this must have had you completely shaken to the core. x

  18. A horrible experience I know all to well as my daughter has been having them since she turned 1 last year. I get scared every time she gets a fever but you learn the signs and she will gradually grow out of them. Glad to hear Esther is ok and I hope William is too as he was probably so worried, bless him xx

  19. Oh my goodness, I hope Esther is on the mend now. My middle child had 2 febrile convulsions, the first one was the worse. The raging temperature, floppy body, eyes rolled back and foaming at the mouth. I was in a complete state of panic, we dialled 999. After a 2 day stay in hospital because the temperature would not subside it was put down to a viral infection. Apparently at 18 months of age they can’t regulate their body temperatures very well. I learnt about the recovery position, that calpol and neurofen could be used alternately and that thankfully the child doesn’t remember it. It’s making me well up thinking about it all now and particularly how it must have been for you. I wish you all well. xx

  20. Febrile convulsions are utterly terrifying. I wish the universe could have spared you this experience. My son suffers epileptic seizures that are very similar to febrile convulsions in that he stops breathing. First time it happened we thought he was dead. He’s had six of them in his life and each time I think we are losing him. It’s utterly awful. Thank you for this post and for raising awareness of something all parents should know x

  21. Oh Jennie I am so so sorry you all went through this, reading this through tears. I’d heard about febrile convulsions before but thank you for reminding us all. Sending love and strength x

  22. I can’t imagine how terrifying this was Jennie! I also knew next to nothing about frebile convulsions and I’m about to read your follow up info post so I am better prepared should I ever need to be. I think it was only natural that you panicked and feared the worst. I think you will be on permanent red alert with your children for all the years they live under your roof, and then some. I am so pleased that Esther is well and is home where she belongs xx

  23. Nothing can prepare you for dealing with a febrile convulsion or a seizure.

    I’m so sorry you all had to go through this.

    As you know, my little Oz has seizures. They’re non febrile – they’re epileptic.

    Even with all my training and experience it is utterly terrifying. I don’t go into details but we’ve had some pretty awful ordeals with him.

    I’m pleased to say we are 15 months seizure free and I’m glad about that.

    Sending hugs and well wishes for Esther xx

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