1 in 4 pregnancies end in miscarriage
1 in 4
Every one of us knows someone who has lost a baby
Often they will not tell you
They will not tell anyone
Sometimes they will not know themselves
As the loss will be so early on they may not realise
But many women do realise and they choose not to tell
I miscarried this year
In June
Apart from David and my very best friend
No one knows
What could people do?
What could people say?
There seemed no reason to tell
I think I knew from the start
That the pregnancy was not quite right
After years of IVF
A previous miscarriage
And years of symptom spotting
I feel I have become something of a pregnancy expert
And something about this one was not quite right
That did not stop me hoping and dreaming
And wishing for things that would never be
I miscarried a little after 6 weeks
It was nothing like my first miscarriage
I managed it all at home
Alone
With the children around
It was like a very heavy period
A familiar physical pain
With a large dose of heartache
I knew it was coming I think
Because I was quite poorly
My muscles ached
And I had a fever
It was as though my body were fighting an infection
I think it was actually fighting the beginning of a baby
A baby that perhaps was not quite right
Most miscarriages are caused by chromosomal (genetic) abnormalities and other physical factors that are beyond our control
I knew that there was nothing I could do
I was thankful that this loss was uncomplicated
No hospital required
No doctor called
There really was no need to tell anyone
The reason I have decided to speak out now
Is so that other women know
That they are not alone
No one should feel that they are on their own
Though I know from experience that we too often do
Over the coming week
I will be sharing my experience of loss
Failed cycles of IVF
Miscarriage
And losing Matilda Mae to SIDS
At 9 months old
I will be talking about how it has affected me
And my relationships
My family
I will be sharing thoughts and ideas
Poems and songs
I will be sharing all I can
Because 1 in 4 pregnancies end in miscarriage
It is not something that can be ignored
We need to break the silence
We need to break the taboo
I am supporting Baby Loss Awareness Week 2016
And you can too
Find out more information here
And watch this blog and social media
For ideas of how you can get involved
How you can remember your baby
And raise awareness too
Jennie, I’m so sorry that you’ve gone through another miscarriage but pleased that you know it wasn’t your fault and nothing you could do.
One of my best friends has suffered a miscarriage in the last fortnight – she was around the same stage as you. She’s gone back to work today to be sent an email saying she’s lost her 100% attendance bonus because she was off sick. I’m spitting feathers for her. She’s been in touch with the miscarriage association who are going to contact her employers on her behalf. Kind of ironic that they’ve been so unaware this week of all weeks.
Oh Jennie… I wish I had words to make you feel better. I wish I could do something to turn things around for you. I have no idea how I would but I wish I could because you don’t deserve any of what you have been through. I can’t even think of what to say except deeply sorry to hear of your miscarriage. I know it won’t help you, just know that fellow bloggers and fans of your blog are always here for you.