Today I am 27+1

This is a funny time in pregnancy for me

It is a time when I often feel sad

That I have never had an innocent pregnancy

I have never had a tummy full of baby

And a heart full of hope and joy and happiness

I have always been anxious and scared

It was such a struggle for David and I to get pregnant

5 rounds of IVF ICSI

An IVF twin pregnancy is filled with

Drug taking, scans, medical appointments

Then just as we were allowing ourselves to enjoy that first pregnancy

I almost died

Had to have emergency surgery

And almost lost our long longed for babies

At 27 weeks and 3 days

Esther and William were born

My pregnancy with Matilda Mae

Though relatively straight forward

Was filled with fear

What if I was sick again?

What if this baby was a preemie too?

My pregnancy with Bea came after Tilda’s death

And an early miscarriage

And now with baby 5

Our Sprinkle of Stardust

I am pregnant following a second miscarriage

And with the added anxiety about my relative old age!

I am trying so hard to make the most of this pregnancy

Trying to make the most of growing our last baby

Trying to savour completing our family

It is such a precious time

And at 27 weeks I am feeling blessed

Thankful

To have gotten this far

Growing our fifth baby

Our fourth little girl

I am just so desperate to meet her

To have her safely

And bring her home

Her siblings are desperate to meet her!

Her mummy and daddy are too

Here are some specifics

About how I am feeling this time

This pregnancy

At 27 weeks

Baby
As I am a proud mummy of twins born at 27 weeks

I have a fair idea what our little Sprinkle looks like right now

This is Esther at 27 + 6

So small

So beautiful

So perfectly formed

Right now Sprinkle is a tangle of limbs

And I can feel them all

She is kicking and wriggling away

And every movement is a gift

A magical precious gift

Esther and William have felt the baby now

And they are always asking to feel her some more

Mostly though

Our little Sprinkle is active in the evening

And at night

When we are all in bed

I do love this stage of pregnancy

Even with all the anxiety and fear

Our daughter is growing inside of me

Already developing a routine of her own

A character

Getting ready to be born

And be one of us

Keep wriggling little girl

Keep on having that disco in there

We are all head over heels in love with you

And cannot wait to meet you

Me
This has been a tough few weeks

With Tilda’s anniversary

And knowing that this time next year

All being well

We will have a 9 month old baby

My mind has been in overdrive

Worry, anxiety, fear

My bump is feeling huge now

I believe from online sources

That my uterus is now up to my rib cage

This I can tell through the difficulty that I have

Putting my shoes and socks on

We have done a lot of walking for Tilda

The past week or so

I have really loved being outside

But I am carrying this baby very low

And long walks can leave me feeling very uncomfortable

I am generally feeling quite tired

Particularly in the afternoons

The children are being very good at resting with me

Reading books or watching films

I do love being pregnant

And I am loving my 27 week bump

Logistics
With just 13 weeks to go

Until our Sprinkle is due to be here

David and I have started to talk a little about logistics

Seating arrangements for the car

Is going to be a big consideration

And what to do about a pram

As a home educating mummy

I am out and about a lot

Going from class to class with the children

Exploring forests

Roaming fields

Investigating beaches

There is a lot of in and out of the car

There is a lot of times when a buggy will be required

Sometimes for baby

Sometimes for Bea

And sometimes for all our stuff!

Over the coming weeks

We need to work out how the children will best fit in the car

What pram will best suit our needs and fit in the car

What baby carrier to have that is easy for me to get on and off a lot on my own

And how to minimise strain on my back with all the lifting and transporting

I am a 40 year old mummy of 5

These things need careful consideration and planning

It really is a military operation

Being able to successfully get out of the house

Stress free!

Sleep
At 2.5 years old we are struggling to get Bea out of our bed

I adore my daughter

I love snuggling up with her at night

We have stopped breastfeeding recently

And now the time is right

For her to move into a room of her own

As much as I have cherished these past two years

With Bea sleeping in my arms

I have missed out on a lot of time with

Esther and William

And my husband

This time

With this second rainbow baby

I am going to try and be a little less crazy about sleep

I want this final baby to sleep close to me

But I want to sometimes be able to put her down

I know it will be hard

I know I will be terrified

But I know that for my family

I have to do it

I want to have a Snuggle Dreami downstairs

And our Snuzpod upstairs

And I want to try my very best to use them both

From the start

I am busy researching safe sleep products

And safe travel products for our last little one

This is my last chance to get it right for our baby

And to share the things we do

And the products that we use

With others to promote the importance of safe sleep

Names
David and I are still in discussions about Sprinkle’s name

Our last baby

Such an important name

And yet I worry about wasting a name

Just in case she does not turn out to be the last!

I still love the names Mabel and Cordelia

But David is putting his foot down and saying no

We both like the name Edith, Edie

And we always have

I think that Sprinkle most likely will be called Edith

So now we are trying to find the perfect middle name

To complement our other daughter’s middle names

Grace, Mae and Hope

Our list currently looks like this

(In no particular order)

Edith Faith

Edith Mabel

Edith Florence

Edith Mae

Edith May

Edith Jean

I think any final decision now

Will be made when we meet our daughter

Style

I have fallen into the winter maternity trap

Of leggings and jumpers

Comfort is key

But this is my last third trimester

And I want to wear my final bump with style

I am currently looking for pretty maternity and nursing underwear

I am also looking at the possibility of some maternity jeans

Never in all my pregnancies have I worn maternity jeans

And I would like to give them a try

At night I love to snuggle in my pyjamas

And nightdresses from The Essential One

I have started thinking about my hospital bag

It is quite likely

Due to my age

That I will be induced if baby does not come early

I am hoping to buy two Snuggle nightdresses for my hospital stay

And for our lazy days at home

These Shnuggle Hugs are simply stunning

And look so soft and ‘shnuggly’ too

And so that is me

That is us

27 weeks together

Sprinkle and me

All being well

13 weeks to go

Until we get to meet our baby girl

And hold her in our arms

We are so in love with you already

Our beautiful baby Sprinkle

So small

So beautiful

So perfectly formed