This time last year
I took my beautifully bathed baby daughter up the stairs to our room
I sat on the bed with her
Snuggled her
Read to her and sang to her
As I fed her into a contented sleep
Full of mummy’s milk
She fell asleep
How I wish I had kept her there all night
She might be with us still
This time last year
I took my beautifully bathed baby daughter up the stairs to our room
I had no idea that those minutes we spent together
Alone in the dark
Skin to skin
As intimate as only mother and baby could be
I had no idea that those precious minutes together
Would be our last
As I lay her in her cot
Told her I loved her and wished her goodnight
They were the last seconds I would see my daughter alive
I would give anything
Anything at all
To have those moments back
To have Baby Tilda back
Lots of love Jennie xx
So sorry darling. It is so utterly unfair. I’ll be lighting my candle for your baby girl tonight xxx
Oh Jennie, with big fat tears in my eyes I wish more than anything that you could have your baby back too. You are always in my thoughts, but even more so tonight.
She will never ever EVER be forgotten!!! x
Thinking of you
Thinking of you x
It is so terribly unfair and so terribly hard to understand that this ever happened at all. I wish more than anything that everything was so different for you. I have my candle ready to light, and I will never ever forget Matilda Mae
xxxxx
I wish more than anything that beautiful Matilda was still here. So much love and you are all in my thoughts tonight xxx
I am so, so, so, so sorry Jennie x x x x x x x x x x x x x
Your baby angel just awaits you, sending you messages from above…xxxxxx i am always thinking fo u, always sending love and just had a few minutes looking at the stars in the night sky blowing bubbles up to your tilda xxxxx
So terribly sad Jennie. I wish everything was so different for you. I am so so sorry you have lost your baby girl. She had the best mummy in the world for 9 precious months. She will never be forgotten xx
Thinking of you!! Sending love x
My heart just breaks for you. She is looking down on you and will be so proud of you, of how tirelessly you are working in her name for her legacy. I wish I could bring her back for you so much. Xx
Jennie,
I can only imagine what you are going through and then I don’t think I come close. I simply can’t comprehend the pain and heartbreak of losing a child.
What I do know is that the world knows of a little girl called Matilda Mae and it’s a brighter, better place because she was in it.
Her light shines brightly and it shines the brightest through those who loved her the most, her family. Especially you, Jennie.
You are an inspirational lady for what you have done and continue to do in Matilda’s memory. I have so much admiration for you.
My thoughts, along with so many other people’s, have been with you on this sad day. xXx
Thinking of you and your beautiful baby girl x
How very heartbreaking. Hugs.
This is heartbreaking Jennie. I would give anything to turn back time for you. Anything. xx
Oh Jennie I wish this wasn’t so. It’s so unjust 🙁 xxx
Thinking of you all x
Sending lots of love tonight to you all. Thinking of your beautiful girl and how unjust it all is. Wishing so much we could bring her back. I won’t forget her, or her amazing family. Xxxxx
I have no words. My heart breaks for you every day. Always in my thoughts.
I’m so sorry & I feel such sadness for you. I am so sorry I can’t find the words to explain how deeply this has touched me. She was beautiful x
My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your beautiful family this evening Jennie xx
Sending so, so much love to you all xxxxx
Oh Jennie. I have no words of wisdom, just love. Xx
I’m so sorry.
I have no words Jennie. Only tears and big hugs for you and your family. Always thinking of you and Matilda Mae
I would do anything to be able to give you back your beautiful baby. Thinking of you all x
So much love Jennie – you have been in our thoughts all day xxx
I’ve been thinking of you all day xx
No words can convey the sorrow in our hearts. Fly high bright star x
My thoughts are with you xxxxx
Have been thinking of you today, as I do often. You’ve given us all so much to think about. Always. God bless Matilda Mae x
Much much love Jennie today and always to you, David, E and W xxxxxxxxx
been thinking of you all day
cannot believe it has been a year already
you have been so brave and courageous Jennie – a true inspiration
i send you much love (husg) x x x
Thinking of you and your family at this painful time ….. your beautiful daughter is remembered by so many and will never be forgotten xxxx
Oh how I wish I could turn the clocks back for you. Lots of love xxxx
It breaks my heart Jennie. Lord only knows what it has done to yours! So so sad, that she was taken too soon. Far far too soon! xx
I wish we could turn back time for you Jennie. Thinking of you all.
Thinking of you always x
Holding your hand as always X
Candles lit and stars are shining brightly just for you Matilda Mae
Thinking of you. All day and all night. I can not sleep, I can not stop thinking. I can’t imagine how you must be feeling, but I kind of hope you are asleep right now. I’d do anything to give you those moments back, if only that were possible.
Jennie, with all my heart I wish I could magic Matilda back for you. But I have to think that somewhere, somehow you will be together again. The sun came out yesterday as I ran past the fields. I chalked Matilda’s name on the road in pink and said a prayer for her and you. We won’t forget x
I am so so so sorry Jennie. Your beautiful girl Matilda should still be with you. You have been in my thoughts all weekend xxx
Thinking of you and your beautiful family, the stars were beautiful in the sky last night and I know Matilda was up there looking over us all. Remembering such a beautiful baby girl xxx
I am thinking of you and Baby Tilda. xxxx
You and your family are in my thoughts Jennie xx
It’s not fair. Lots of love, Deborah xx
De tout cœur avec toi et ta famille … A year now since a friend of mine told me about baby Tilda. My second son was 6 month old. At the time we were co-sleeping with his ‘open on one side’ cot beside our bed. Easy for nigthtime breastfeeding and to help him to find his sleep. He was a kind of baby kangaroo – always to be carried in our arms to feel secured – ages to get him to find his sleep. For my first, I applied all rules about secure child bedding etc. For my 2nd, I was to exhausted to battle and used to let him fall asleep as he liked which meant putting his face in my pillow. From the day I read your blog about Tilda, I took time to listen to his needs of reassurance to help him to find another safe way to fall asleep. Furthermore it reminded me to enjoy every single even insignificant moment with my two kids. I had forgotten that life can take away those you love. Sincerely with you with all my heart hoping time – caring family and friends will help you to suffer less.
(I do apologize for my English which used to be better. I hope that nothing in my message will hurt you. I intended to thank you having me appreciate even more the time I have to take care and love my children even when life is hard).
Thinking for you! Sending love from miles away!
They say that for grief to ease you have to do a year and a day to go through all those landmarks and anniversaries. I don’t know if this is true but I hope it is. I hope you find some peace soon. I’ve followed your story for the past year and think you have been amazing. She would be very proud of you xxxx
Jennie I thought about you non stop all day. About how every single day must be so hard to get up and face the day, but that yesterday must have been even worse. I wish more than anything in the world that you could have Matilda back. It breaks all of our hearts, so lord only knows how you must feel. LL was born a week after Matilda went to the sky and I still remember lying in hospital sobbing for you- I felt such a strange range of emotions, and felt scared, guilty and questioning why over and over. I didn’t know you properly bar meeting you briefly a couple of times, but I still felt guilty. And there hasn’t been a day when I haven’t thought about you since. I know you get people saying it to you all the time, but you are a truly remarkable woman. You convey yourself with the most incredible dignity and courage, and I think you may just about be one of the most inspirational and loving people I have ever met. She would be so very proud of you. I am so sorry. I will never forget your little star. I can promise you that. xxxxxxxx
This is so heartbreaking I don’t know what to say. My thongs are with you at this sad time. Xx
I read this last night. I read and I cried. I read and I couldn’t find the right words so I read, cried and ran.
I still can’t find the right words. I don’t think I ever will. All I can say is that my heart goes out to you and to David and it always will. It’s so cruel and so unfair. I’m so sorry.
Sending you love, always.
xx
My heart is breaking for you all over again. My JB was just 2 days old when Tilda went to sleep, i just couldn’t believe the news when i came out of hospital. Life is so cruel, Tilda will never be forgotten. With every pink sky i see, every star i think of Tilda and i know others do too. Much love xx
I only discovered your blog on the 2nd February and the first post I read was this.I am not a mother myself only being 18, but reading this absolutely broke my heart and led me to cry for several hours.I am so so sorry for the loss of your beautiful baby girl Tilda Mae, I for one, know that I will never ever forget her beautiful sparkling smile. RIP angel, fly high xx
How loved she was and still is. It is so unfair and I will think it for the rest of my life. Xxx
i am thinking of you all much love Claire xxxx
Sending you many loving thoughts. I am so sorry this happened to you and beautiful Matilda Mae. X
I am so so so sorry this has happened:( My mother went through the same thing with my older brother and younger brother. I am so sorry:( I know someone is taking good care of him in heaven where he is.