Ours is not a happy house at the moment

I am not sure it really has been since Baby Tilda died

I know that I struggle every day

Now it is increasingly obvious that David is also struggling

Esther and William too

There is never a fun carefree atmosphere

And if there is ever anything close to it

There seem to be consequences

For all of us

Someone said to me recently

That I need to put on my own oxygen mask

Before I try to help others

Even my own children

And I am starting to realise they are right

I am so unhappy with who I am

And what I do

That I am not able to make things better for others

I think honestly I am probably making things worse

So things are going to be changing

As I try to put my house in order

And set my priorities straight

Starting with myself

And locating that oxygen mask

So I can put it on