“The most terrible poverty is loneliness, and the feeling of being unloved.”
― Mother Teresa
“The loneliest moment in someone’s life is when they are watching their whole world fall apart, and all they can do is stare blankly.”
― F. Scott Fitzgerald
“When you’re surrounded by all these people, it can be lonelier than when you’re by yourself. You can be in a huge crowd, but if you don’t feel like you can trust anyone or talk to anybody, you feel like you’re really alone.”
― Fiona Apple
“Separation
Your absence has gone through me
Like thread through a needle.
Everything I do is stitched with its colour.”
― W.S. Merwin
This week is always a lonely week for me.
Each year I realise that the number of people who remember Tilda on her birthday grows smaller and smaller. Of course it is the way of things, she is dead and has been for nearly 10 years but it does not stop the pain when each year her birthday becomes for me a lonelier and lonelier occasion.
I also feel sad and lonely for Edie as her birthday is also forgotten or not acknowledged by some who you might expect a card or a message from.
She is not dead!
Life as a bereaved mother brings with it loneliness because no one can understand the path you travel. Life as a mother of premature babies can bring loneliness, not many people understand the trauma and grief of premature birth, living through NICU and constantly battling for your children to get the support that they need and the strength needed to protect them in a world that does not really yet understand the long term effects of being born 3 months early. Home educating is a lifestyle choice that leads to loneliness as people do not understand the life you have chosen for your family and make a lot of assumptions about you and how you spend your days and what your ethos on life, education and parenting. Health anxiety also brings loneliness. It is funny when I think back to my childhood and teens and young adulthood. I would never have thought I would feel so alone at the age of 45, but I do.
So if you do too, I see you and I get it. Please reach out if you can. I know how impossibly hard that is. I know that for me being lonely is often easier. This year’s Mental Health Awareness Week focuses on loneliness and encourages us all to reach out and find a way to bring people together.
The books I have chosen to share today are middle grade reads that I think would resonate with many adults, stories of loneliness and friendship, finding courage, strength and hope.
Together we can tackle loneliness!