There is no getting away from the fact it is coming

The holidays are coming

My children are beyond excited

I am looking forward to making the season magical for them this year

I want them to have hearts filled with happy Christmas memories

As I have

I have always adored Christmas

Until last year

Our first without our daughter

Our first without Matilda Mae

Our Christmas Star

Now everything about Christmas hurts

All the things I have loved so much, for so long

Cause me pain

The things that should bring happiness

Bring sadness and tears

As we gather together as an extended family

As groups of friends

It is all too painfully obvious

That our little girl is not here

Not enough cousins at Grannny’s

One grandchild too few

One less pile of presents to wrap

One less fussy mouth to feed

One smile missing

This year should be her first when she would truly understand

The magic of Christmas

I try to be happy for all those families coming together

But it breaks my heart that our little family

Will never ever be complete

Our Christmas can never be truly happy and merry

Because Matilda Mae is not there

This year is Bea’s first Christmas

I will spend the whole season praying

That it will not also be her last

I cannot even write this post without crying

How am I going to get through the days?

Festivities, occasions and gatherings

Really shine a spotlight

On the cracks in our lives

They highlight the horror and heartache

Of the missing

The symbolism of Christmas time

The stories and the songs

They all take on new meaning

When your baby is dead and gone

Christmas Dinner 2012

Today was totally a Breastvest kind of day

A day when feeding Bea anywhere is going to feel cold

A day when I want to snuggle in a warm jumper

And not worry about having to wear a top specifically designed for feeding

The Breastvest was made for days like these

And for the winter season to come

If you are nursing a baby this coming cold season

Make Breastvest your friend

Breast Vest is an ingenius innovation that allows breastfeeding mummies to get back into their old clothes and even buy some new ones … fashionable, attractives clothes designed to make a lady feel good rather than for ensuring easy access for feeding. The Breast Vest turns any top into a breastfeeding top.

Breast Vest is designed to be worn underneath your normal tops with a nursing bra to allow you to feed discretely whilst returning to your pre pregnancy clothes.

For me the advantages of the Breast Vest has been that it covers my huge and horrible abdominal scar and it also disguises the fact that most days I am still wearing maternity jeans and trousers!

The Breastvest offers an extra layer of discretion

An extra layer of warmth

An extra layer of confidence

For the breastfeeding mummy

Available in black and white and a steady stream of limited edition colours

Breastvest comes in XS, S, M, L and XL sizes

And makes any top a breastfeeding top

Would you like to win one?

You can do so right here by filling in the rafflecopter form below

UK Entrants Only please

Good Luck!

a Rafflecopter giveaway